He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm really busy with my period
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