And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
My vagina just recognized that song.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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