My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
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