Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
