if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
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