i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize