I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
