shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
