I want to stick my p in your. b.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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