the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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