I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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