so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
