Its about making memories worth repressing
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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