I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
