Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
