sarcasm needs its own font
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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