did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Randomize