the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize