you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
