New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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