Are we in a gay sports bar?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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