States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
