I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
