So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
