Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I touched a dick in church today
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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