I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
