i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
is that a dick in a sweater?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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