how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Randomize
