DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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