I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
