You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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