my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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