You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
