we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize