Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
