so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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