The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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