I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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