he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Blow job season was short but glorious.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
