i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
