Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize