dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
