i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
420 ftw
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
