I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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