Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
