found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
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