I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
