make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
