I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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