we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize