I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
