come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize